Having recently held investigations into steroids and college football’s BCS system, it was announced today that the U.S. Congress will again be intervening in the sports world to investigate the ruling on the field that it was a fumble.

            Cliff Stearns (R-Fla.), the chairman of the House Subcommittee on Commerce Trade and Consumer Protections, told the press this morning that the investigation will focus on Sunday’s Dolphins-Chargers game, in which a fumble by Miami running back Ronnie Brown at the goal line was challenged by the Dolphins and upheld upon review.

            Rep. Stearns, a lifelong Dolphins fan, said he was watching Sunday’s game on television and became incensed when Brown coughed the ball up.

            “We were about to put the game away and take a 13-point lead and then Brown goes and fumbles. It really pissed me off,” said Rep. Stearns. “And then they show the replay and it looks, to me at least, that he didn’t even fumble. So why would the officials say it was a fumble? It was right then that I thought: ‘Hey, I’m a powerful Congressman. Since I don’t have much else better to do, I can pull these refs before Congress and make them answer for their decision. And that’s what I plan to do.”

            Referee Tony Corrente, replay official Bob Mantooth and the rest of the nine-man crew that worked Sunday’s game will be forced to testify this Friday before Stearns’ House Subcommittee – the same subcommittee that looked into steroids and the BCS.

            “The American people need to know that we are here in Washington looking out for them and being ever-vigilant about the issues that truly matter to them,” said Rep. Stearns. “We will not rest until that call is overturned and the Dolphins receive an official apology.”

            Corrente, who made the fumble ruling on the field, said he is willing to cooperate with the investigation, but doesn’t see its importance.

            “I’m going to hold my tongue a bit here because I don’t want to make any of the Congressmen angry before I testify, but this has to be the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard of,” he said. “Congress continues to overstep its bounds. And on top of everything else, that was clearly a fumble by Brown. And the replay showed it was clearly a fumble. This is such a waste of our time and a waste of taxpayers’ money.”

            But Rep. Stearns disagrees.

            “The NFL is a multibillion dollar industry that plays in taxpayer-funded stadiums,” he said. “It is most definitely the business of Congress to make sure that they get their fumble rulings correct. Plus, we really enjoy doing these investigations into sports. It’s not nearly as boring as all that war and taxes junk, but even better is that a lot of the times we get to meet and talk to famous athletes. I had Mark McGwire sign a bunch of stuff for my kids earlier this year. It was totally awesome.”